its between the smiles and the blank stares that it exists
that small feeling of everything and nothing at the same time
the slender looks and the dirty things that i feel when i look at you.
its a catalyst for the end(ing).
constantly in chaos
in terror
in confusion
this feeling is nothing more but a packaged over the counter pill that i take every day
one in the morning
one in the evening
just to keep this running strong, even if i dont like it- just because its familiar
forgot where to plug back in
reconnect
restart
reconnect
restart
never get past point C, just repeat and fumble at B
it would be so much easier to spill it all over the walkway
all over the road
just to get it all out.
violent nights with too much alcohol
punches that bruise and break everything including me
i'm at war with myself and i am losing.
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1 comment:
i'm so glad that you are still writing. you have so much talent and i love to see you use it. i wish i still wrote like i used to. it's hard, now that i have a baby. but every now and then i will jot stuff down in my journal.
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