couldnt be fancy in black and white if i tried

push the noise up to 10. i want to feel the pulse beat through my skull and pound these thoughts to a smashed piece of broken bad art.
its like holding onto a 20 and betting 40. pressing repeat just to hear the intro over and over.
never move on to the chorus....
always had more talent at playing dead than potential at being alive
its like realizing summer is over in two days, or realizing that i like how you smile and laugh.
the verse sounds how you move, how you walk to pick up the pieces of my life that is scattered over the road
is this real? or is it just to pass the time.....
like a mechanical arm, drink drink drink....
its just too easy to die inside
been feeling more and more like a worn piece of wood than a classy piece
waiting to see how distance wears this down
is it actually loneliness?
is it boredom?
is it actually compassion?
that feeling of when our mouths do things they shouldnt
whether it be word or kiss
pushing good or bad intentions past the lips
its always before and after vs the what ifs
these moments, its always these moments when i realize that you are more than just a time occupier- you are what makes the song shine so bright
what makes the strings dance and pull and eventually break
if only i could be new again, this slate is dirty and needs to be replaced
kind of wish noone remembered me
kind of wish i could turn the self hate off
kind of wish that i didn't kind of wish so much
you would think control would come with age.
the first step is always admitting the problem.......

this burn is getting too familiar

stare across the room-
if only i could kill with a glance.....
i would become the world's greatest killer. put ted bundy to shame.
jack the ripper would look like a warm up compared to me.
they would call me the population control device.
wearing my heart on my sleeve is out of fashion, just a show of poor taste
slowly learning how things were/are after the reset button is pressed
keep pushing it until the problem goes away.
but it doesnt.
the shared glances that both people understand but dont want to
like being a survivor of the Holocaust, only you get it but why would you want to? price is too high
still trying to empty the baggage, all ports still closed