water and snow and ice

its so much easier to hate

put you on a pedestal and yell for a hanging

aiming my arrows and not thinking twice

not realizing i was falling in love

if that is even what you could call it

this feeling of killing and loving you at the same time

the ultimate love/hate relationship

the birds are singing such sweet songs

but the churches stay only half full

you stare through half lovers

and i hope these eyes can burn your soul

empty

i am out of love and time

stuck in the past of me and you

this was never over

as i solemnly drink and sing the blues

hoping someone listens and sings along

singing out of windows kept down

chasing green lights at midnight through this town

i wished on my favorite songs that you think of me

more like a lover and less like a friend

at the best we can be enemies till the end

wonder hunger

i am a stranger to your world

please explain to me what this all means

i knock on your doors

but you never answer

lights are on

and sounds drift out

but knocks go unanswered

so you say you dont love him anymore

so why does he still cling to your arm

hands on hips

necks to lips

i guess his love is stronger than yours

its sharp looks that only cut you and me

blood spills that only you and i can see

staining our shoes, bloody footprints as you leave

glass smiles for (the) drives that go long miles

guts

love is cheap

love is vile

love is dirty

love is violence

love is good.

you

its been a long time

since i let myself care about you

the smile and touch

to be honest i dont see the point

sleeping closer to the blade never helped me sleep

but i want you

in ways i dont know

touching holes in your back trying to be discreet

you can only play so much with fire before you lose control

while i bite back words of not wanting you to leave

these cold nights and lonely mornings softly speak

of how you went on to keep on loving

no success

but until then i hold on

fight and struggle

for peace and love

for things i cant describe

for things i dont know

for that thing that keeps the lights burning

the fire warm

been punching brick walls

with no success

gleaming

We shake our heads no as we mouth yes

lips always betraying

our fears remaining out of breath

all our pockets are short of heart

giving you layers of my soul

shes giving layers of her skin

as the cutting room floor is knee deep in our clothes

shoulders cut by angels and demons

for the power or love we will

praying in pews

weighing forgiveness and sins

we all hate our jobs

my clarity is fading fast

wondering what i suffer for

these screams were meant to echo through hills

not halls

spread my arms and let the wind guide me

through clouds and wars i have to fight alone

new set of normal ways to live this life

you can all stay frozen and watch me pass

i will die searching for the way to live

for the way to love

i may have been left behind

but i will catch (you)p

dont touch

i am a rusted wheel running myself over

bruised knuckles

they all sneak glances through the tears in your clothes

piercing through skin dying to touch your soul

selfish gulps from a sacred river

no man could ever hope to understand

and i sit and watch

as the hunt and search game plays every day

weak minds turn easy lies to friendly nights

reading the lines that lead into unhappy brides

behind these doors i search for something reminding of better times

photographs of easier lives

sunday church

the pews can fill with the hurt

holding their bleeding hearts to the air

death cab for you and me

we sat on the curb

as night turned into morning

making a living by talking of the killings of our loves

the crickets sang and the stars burned

and i waited for moonlight to kiss (you)

hoping to meet you in your (bed)room

but the truth was we never knew what to do

time flew but the night stayed strong for us

the gods dont wait for permission

to take fate and make careless moves

so we spoke soft

and hoped for sparks

but these holes are too deep

graves already marked

coffins already placed

if only we knew how to love

calls too late

This compass spins with no north

a dream you cant wake from

this ship circles in the fog

and everything slowly turns into fear

nights are cold and long

frantically searching for light

as these eyes stay open searching

there is no reason why i end up this way

hunting and running with my ghosts

help me close my eyes in these weary times

sinking boats floating home

On these english lands i watch the forest flood with love

on these irish streets i see the roads drown in love

on these scottish hills i hear the songs of love

on these french streets i see the lights of love

on these german mountains i taste the fruits of love

on the soil i call home

i pour water on dying plants

in hopes it is enuogh to save them

withered grounds and harsh winds

i ran until i watched the sky kiss the ocean

overcast clouds parted for the romance to swim

from distant seas to the grass that grazes my skin

empty pockets of luck

nothing but crumbled maps that cant be read

you looked at me and no words need be said

"im tired of you" rang true from one ear to the other

say it now

these mirrors taunt me

reminding me of what i am

despite my words that fight otherwise

im drinking water from a dry river

as everything i know is not what they believe

the monster who is misunderstood

or maybe not....

this beast doesnt hunt and kill for joy like you think

this monster needs to survive somehow

or at least thats what he keeps repeating to himself

i didn't understand

I've spent lifetimes learning how to hate

how to force love out of my life

repeating that this is alright

but now i know

but now i learned

this hole in my heart i tore

is not what i need

i tire of sailing this void

but this is what happens when my love turns into hate

and now this head pounds to a different beat

these eyes pulse to a new clock

veins full of something new and foreign

yet i keep in mind a monster still stares back in the mirror

and now i breath cleaner air from greener lands

this soul is trying to believe

i dont care

these drinks help me settle

apologies

i never felt it

the normal

the right

the way its supposed to be

i tear at walls and smiling faces just to try to show that no-

i dont get it

i dont understand

i'm sorry but i have to destroy you in order to show you

in order to understand

this chaos may never cease

and i may never see or be able

but please believe this begging plea of how this heart tries to be pure

tries to shine

despite the outcome

despite the methods

it tries to shine in all the darkest of places

sometimes getting through

but really- just being misread in a different language.